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Blueprint Dating Diary: Asking Questions and Giving Thanks
by: Thursday Nov 3 2011
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I will only ask this question once, fellow readers, I promise. But what (may I ask you) is the point of creating a profile on a dating site on the internet where you sell yourself as the most eligible bachelor(ette) with pictures of you in your Saturday finest next to your very witty and wry answers to silly personal questions if you’re never actually going to meet anyone in person? What is the point I ask (okay, I admit, this could count for a second time) of taking the time and effort out of your day, time that could presumably be spent NOT AT A COMPUTER to generate the best online dating profile EVER if you plan to stay immobile, behind the computer? Or, if I may be so bold to extend this question, what is the point of emailing someone on a set up and when that person kindly and swiftly responds to your email with their telephone number, you never write back or even dare to call? Last question I promise- what are we all so afraid of?





Clearly this lends itself to bigger questions about the fear of human communication and the modern answer to avoidance contained behind the keys on our keyboard. The internet has killed the era of anonymity and birthed the age of dating without ever leaving your desk. Why meet one real life human being when you can email with 50 gorgeous babes? Perfectly reasonable except for the fact that the whole point of going on this site was to ‘meet’ someone, right? So meet ‘em for goodness sakes!

I apologize for my ranting but as you’ve already probably guessed, this happened to me not too long ago.

I was stood up, or rather made to sit down (back to the computer!) on two occasions recently. Just last week I received a surprising internet dating email. This forward gentleman skipped all the email foreplay and went right to it; in just one line he asked me to go to the Opera with him. At first I was taken aback, he hadn’t even asked my name, or stated his. But, he asked me to the Opera. I have never been to the Opera, and so immediately this email exuded sexiness and intrigue. Ok, nameless guy, I will listen to people sing loudly and incoherently for three hours with you. So we were confirmed…that is, until he texted me cancelling because he was sick. ‘Ok’, I told myself, these things happen, people get sick all of a sudden. But the text to cancel was followed up with a slew of texts containing personal questions, which I answered until I told him to ‘hold off, let’s find out these fun facts in person’. ‘Alright’, he replied. And then…nothing. Never heard from him again, which makes me think he never really meant to meet me.

Or how about that other email I received two weeks ago, from a gentleman who had been given my email as a set up. The one where, as I said, I wrote him with my number (oh, the risks I’ll take!), to which I received only silence. This takes me back to the initial question- what is the point of reaching out, if you’re not going to follow up in person?

As you can imagine, all this questioning makes a lady get confused. And sometimes, I need to feel confident and believe in a few things. So, in light of the coming holiday- the one where we stuff ourselves with Turkey, I am going to mention just a few things that I don’t need to question- the things I know that I am one hundred percent thankful for, at least, in regards to dating. I am thankful for a smile, or maybe even a hug, from a stranger who risks meeting in person, and the ability to hear that voice and not just see it as words on a screen. Mostly, I am thankful for having the guts to put myself out there in what can sometimes be an isolating world, and for those who do the same. And of course for that gift I like to call the human touch. Oh, and for you, dear reader, I am thankful for you.


   


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